Praying for the end of Trauma

 I'm trying my best to release the negative energy back into the universe.

I can almost feel its manifestation on me and it bothers me so much I get headache and doesn't even sleep.

Thoughts that run through my mind are things I used to do for him which he never noticed.

I will spend 20 mins heading to his place to sleep because I was worried he couldn't sleep, and then I wake up early and try to leave before 6:50am because his carpark charges another day's parking at 7am. Also, I don't want to pay $3 of ERP to go home. I can't believe he said he is not important when I ask him to give me an answer to whether he will commit or not.

He doesn't want to resolve any of those points, but still want to continue as friends, I don't think that's gonna happen.

I honestly don't know why he bothered to text "I hope you stay safe" when he really dgaf to me. He don't care and he won't care.

However, I was surprised when he apologised. Slightly taken aback as if he is aware that he is wrong...  why still do it?

Maybe that's the more scary part - that you're aware yet you can't stop making mistakes.

Hope we all become better soon.